Government says symptoms of infection include fever, disorientation, seizures, vomiting . . . Gas prices rising across the nation, up 38 cents in last month... Military personnel stationed across Pennsylvania, Ohio and West Virginia . . . Face masks on eBay go for more $40+ each . . . State Universities enforce 6 pm curfew for all students . . . Mob at drug store leaves 9 dead, 14 injured . . . All flights to Alaska and Hawaii cancelled indefinitely . . . How to Survive Anything, Anywhere by Chris McNab tops bestseller lists . . . Red Cross calls for volunteers with medical-related experience . . . Young girl creates chaos at the Memphis State Zoo . . . Suspicious video shows shadowed creature jumping from tree to tree . . . President will address the nation in televised speech Thursday at 7 PM.
 
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Diagnosis via Tweets

Feel free to check out that Twitter-account analyzer we’ve got hooked up. The media keeps talking about all the things that the infected seem to obsess over, and the symptoms they seem to show, so we took those and plugged them into a program that looks over someone’s musings. Take it with a grain of salt — but if your friends are popping up with some pretty high scores on there, you may want to avoid some face-to-face contact with them until this whole thing blows over.

It’s gotta blow over, right?

 

2 Responses to “Diagnosis via Tweets”

  1. TIARA says:
    May 5 at 3:42 am

    yea i want to no tol i heard About it on the radio its sum type of airbourne floating aroung gettin ppl sick but i dnt thin it made it to detroit yet hopfully it dnt

  2. darkrwater says:
    June 18 at 6:17 pm

    It has made it to detroit. I am stuck in my office under my desk, trying to stay quiet. they are out there and they are hungry.
    i can’t belive my pastor is now one of them.
    help me, send help to dearborn heights mi

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